Duggie

Maybe not as bad as it sounds but i feel really depressed at the monent folks. I can't for the life of me figure it out though. Got good results in the A-levels (BBC) and into the Uni of choice (Motorsport Engineering at Oxford Brookes, they only wanted a D and an E!) The car is running fine and i have a job I really enjoy at the moment (only £5/hour though). I have two really close friends that I can always depend on when the going gets tough and yet, i feel worse than I have done in a long while.
Maybe it's the fact that i really like one of my two best friends and would like to start a more intimate relationship but can't seem to tell her that and maybe it's that fact that the other of the two best friends is off and away to study medicine for 5 years. Maybe it's that I want the fabia to be more powerful or just a more powerful car and don't have the money...

...Maybe it's all in my head.

Needed to vent folks.

-Duggie.

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Johnny50

Don't fret young Duggie.

Everyone goes through a phase like that mate.

Go tell your friend you fancy her...what you got to lose ?

And as for your other friend going to study, i'm afraid thats part of growing up.
Lost touch with many a friend due to people going away to uni etc (although all back in touch now)

The car...just enjoy it, keep your cash for something else when funds allow.

In the meantime, a few cans of Stella tonight should dull the pain.

Duggie

I don't drink... should have mentioned that... make up for that with cigs though... lol.
I have told her... she just seems rather quiet about the whole thing.

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Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today. Jabbasport rear ARB... (HELL YEAH) Weitec V1 coilovers. Vrs 16' Alloy Wheels. Forge Front Strut Brace. Sidestrips off. Colour coded front grille. Alpine IVA-D105R headunit twinned with a Novex bandpass sub enclosure 2X12 inch subs and a Fusion 1000W amp. Hornet Maxx1 auto alarm.

heresmo

Maybe, Duggie, it's that your life is changing and you're not sure what your future anchor point will be? It happens to us all at one time or another during our lives, though certainly for many it will be happening at this time of the academic year. The only thing I can suggest is that you recognise that you have have your own inner strengths that will carry you through. We all depend to a greater or lesser extent on people around us and we like at least some of our possessions. Perhaps look at the complete picture?

Mo

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smstext

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soviet

Hi Duggie,

I cannot understand that you have a problem here, as you seem to be getting all of the things from life that you are wishing for. If you are having in your mind that you have serious problems then, I think that you need to consider here, the people around the planet that are not having the food to eat, and the ones that are suffering war, and the children that are being exploited and abused here.
I do not understand your problem, or the others that are depressed on the forum here, as I am thinking that as long as I have water in the tap where I am living, and the crust of bread to eat, then I am thinking that I am the lucky one.
I think that your situation is cozy, and you should be remembering the situation of those that are not so lucky. I would ask here if this thread is the genuine plea for being depressed, or one that is saying, look at me, look what I am achieving here, as you seem intent here of including what you are doing. Does anyone really care that you may be growing the eight arms from the top of your head here, and am saying, hey look at me! look how good I am here! Why are you the spoilt selfish one?

Soviet

Lummox

Tell your friend how you feel about them.

They may well feel the same way about you, even if they don't feel te same way they will probably have guessed anyhow, usually its very obvious. If they are as good friend as you say they are they will understand. I had feelings for a girl I hung around with for ages, I didn't tell her. Eventually I did after about two years of moping about. She said she knew but didn't feel the same way but didn't want to hurt my feelings. But tbh once it was all out in the open we could get on with being mates and I could move on and find someone else (always been a bit of a hopeless romantic). Still mates now and chat everynow and again some 11 years later.

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WW_VRS

Everyone has times where it feels a bit like things aren't going your way, be in in love, life, money, job, anything like that. Life is not always fair either for that matter, and not in your control.

Thing is, it is how you deal with that that makes the difference. In your case with your friend you are close so you can probably speak with her about it, and if it is mutual, then great, if it is not, then at least you know, as per Ross' post

Keep a smile, stay positive, and make the most of life. Work out what your next goal is, and work for it. You'll feel better for having set yourself a goal, and you'll dedicate your energy towards it. Once you achieve it, even partially, you will feel better again. If you cant achieve it, you can take pride in having tried your best. Just stick with it

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Allams Skoda

Similar type of thing happened to me, I think it is just part of growing up.

Get yourself into a hobby, I know it sounds pretty gay but I got into photography and I'd take a drive out to somewhere just to take photos of stuff. Try going to events that you know sod all about and armed with a massive camera people assume you work for local media/press and no one cares if you snap everything in sight, it is a good way for meeting new people. Who knows you might even meet a nice new girl.

I also know what it is like to have a best friend that you really like, and when you drop hints it doesn't seem to go anywhere. Best thing to do just cherish the friendship you've got and don't dwell on the fact that you might like to be a little more than friends. But what will be, will be.

I apart form the Uni part it sounds like we have a similar story so if you want to vent further your welcome to PM me.

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Duggie

Soviet, I understand what you are saying about third world countries and other people not so far away that are having a far worse time than I am. I was not listing my achievements to say "look at me arn't I great" But rather to make the point that I don't know why I am feeling like this when things are going so well. If I did want to brag about how well I was doing, have no worries, I would have made a thread titled "Duggie, master of all he survays".

James, thank you so much for the kind offer of a Pm chat... I feel a big Brisky roadtrip around the UK might be needed just so certain folks (like myself) can have a change of scene for a weekend or so... maybe time to organise one?

You're too right there mate!

Thanks to all who have posted, i must be off to work now but have no fear... chances are i'll be back on about midnight!

-Duggie.

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Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today. Jabbasport rear ARB... (HELL YEAH) Weitec V1 coilovers. Vrs 16' Alloy Wheels. Forge Front Strut Brace. Sidestrips off. Colour coded front grille. Alpine IVA-D105R headunit twinned with a Novex bandpass sub enclosure 2X12 inch subs and a Fusion 1000W amp. Hornet Maxx1 auto alarm.

Babs

Back in 2004 my best mate moved to Bangor (some 200 mile trip away) for university.

It's been tough, but we see each other quite often. You've just got to stick with it

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soviet

Hi Duggie,

I am still not really seeing that you have a problem, and maybe if you are feeling this way it would be good for you too do more exercise, and maybe the jogging as it will be making your brain and body fitter for life I think. Unless you are doing this already maybe.

My father who is the Englishman, always was saying to me that life is what you are making of it, and as my mothers side you are not able sometimes to do this, and so you are lucky and need to learn this I think.

I am now the retired one with the bad back problem, but I am thinking of going to the university again, for not what I am gaining by money afterwards of the comforts of life, as these do not interest me, but I am thinking of doing some different things and have enquired, and I am going in to the second year of the degree course here, if I decide to do this.

The point that I am telling you here is that I am thinking of doing this again for the pleasure as I always enjoy this part of life. I have been looking in to these things at this time, before new term that is starting soon, or maybe I would like to do some teaching maybe. This should be seen as the pleasure in life, that you have the chances that so many are not having.
The point that I am making for you is that you are the lucky one, as I have travelled to the Gambia previously, and the children there have to do very hard work for paying for school, and they are always running to one, asking if you will have pencil and paper to give to them, as if it is gold here. You have all the luxury things, with compared to this, and so I do not see why you are feeling depressed and dissatisfied with your world.
I think that you need to hear the saying, you do not know that you are born yet, and I am not meaning to be unkind to you here.

Best of luck to you, and you need to cheer up I think, I hope that you will feel good soon, and apologies here for calling you the selfish one, as my words were too strong maybe.

Soviet

heresmo

Soviet, if I may, I think you are talking as someone who has worked through things already and have come to reach decisions that you have decided are the best for you. That is perhaps different from people who aren't sure how best to deal with things that could be bubbling up at the same time at the moment and haven't yet got to the stage of seeing the best path ahead for them.

In some respects, we are all in that position, for one reason or another in our own lives as the future holds few certainties. Regrettably, being thankful for what one has now doesn't really help an awful lot with worries about what might be.

Surely it's better to try to plan for a happy future, with any advice, help and comments (good or bad)? After all, quote "The future starts now."

Regards
Mo

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soviet

Hi Mo,

I am maybe a bit hard on the thoughts of the young fellow here, as you are saying that I am already finding my direction in life, and it is not coming so hard for me now. But my English father was always telling me about the ones that are not so lucky, and that life is to be what one is making of it.
I am thinking also that Duggie being the young one, is needing the companion to share his experiences with, as he is starting through life, but the saying is going, that there are the plenty of the fish in the sea.
I am never feeling depressed as I am always aware of the ones in the world that are not having the opportunities, or abilities, as me being the lucky one. Life is not so easy, and one is needing to go and get the things that are making happiness, and this is not always the material gains.

I really hope that Duggie, is finding the happiness, as this is the most important thing I think.

Soviet